Chasing Ideals

Another birthday, another member of the fam to celebrate. Today is my mother's birthday and how I wish I could be there with her. In addition to her greatest accomplishment, i.e. my birth, she has lived an inspiring life. She has sacrificed more than thirty years to her family in the midst of tremendous obstacles and major life changes. From the rigorous country life in Ireland to the madness of city life in Phoenix my mother has braved it all. She has raised five marvelous children who are better prepared for this life because of her influence and her great love for us. In my life she has always shown such great care for me. I know that so much of the security I felt in my childhood rested in that knowledge. Even now she looks for small ways to remind me of that love and her thought for me.

How has her love and life influenced yours one might ask? I am a more caring and loving man as result of her influence. I am better prepared for marriage and fatherhood. She showed me what it means to make a home a home where others are welcomed and can find rest. So few people understand anymore how to make there home a place of welcome and care but I have seen that I appreciate this and cherish the opportunity to create that environment. There is something so refreshing in arriving at a home where preparations are always made to refresh the guest. My mother is very affectionate also and I have certainly followed in the footsteps. I have seen time and time again the power behind displaying affection to those that I love. Individuals in society today are starved of that language of love and I know that I am blessed to understand its necessity.

All that I want in the future comes with sacrifice and the example of my mother is an inspiration towards that end. She has given so much of herself to my father and to the lives of myself and my siblings. It is a gift of God that I need not search for such an example. Even now the work that she has chosen as a medical assistant is a testament to the care she has for others and the conscientious attitude with which she approaches her work. Happy Birthday to one whose life has meant so much for mine. Click on the picture to see some more and do not forget to read Turkish Delights Part 2 below.

Before going any further I should give the names of my gracious hosts. They are Emre and Nihal Tasci and have a 40 day old son whose name I won't yet attempt to spell. Day two of my Turkish exploits was spent with Emre's older brother Cahit. He offered to take me to the coast and fishing in his boat. It was a first for me out on the Mediterranean and a relaxing way to spend an afternoon. It also further inspired me to one day have a boat and be able to do the same. Cahit speaks a fair amount of English as well and so I had the chance to learn a bit about the country I find myself in. This may be no suprise to some but the memorable moment of the day came with an uncomfortable crotch reference. Displays the beauty of the language barrier. I had said to Cahit I needed that to use the loo and he asked, "little or." I looked at him confusedly and said "what." He then pointed to my crotch and said "little." A lesser chap may have gone to blows at the comment but understanding came quickly. A few moments later I realized why he had asked as the toilet looked like a post Cinco de Mayo nightmare. The place wasn't fit for anything more than "little." Another development is that my name in Turkey has become Scaler. Cahit was the first to adjust the sound and subsequent others now say the same. I have become no stranger to this so have no trouble with it now.

Day three, Sunday, I again spent time with Cahit and some of his chums. It was the day before the beginning of Bayran Ramadam and items must be purchased for the festivities that have gone on Monday to today. Bayran is one of the major holidays of the Islamic people. It is a time to be together with family and friends. For the month previous to Bayran no sweet foods are to be eaten so then during the three days of Bayran many types of sweets things are prepared. Tasty time for yours truly to show up in the area. A honey drenched slab of baklava is hard to pass up at the worst of times. Spending the day with the old fellas was a good experience. I understood not a word of what was said but nontheless enjoyed wandering around with them to bakers, sweet makers, and smelly fish sellers. The last bunch were slightly less appealing. At least in Can people seem to be well connected with each other and especially when with Cahit many stops are made to say hello to various individuals. There is much more of an emphasis on maintaining close contact with one's family also.

On Monday morning before visits to the families of Emre and Nihal and the consumption of mass amounts of sweets I was invited to attend a prayer service at the mosque. Upon entrance to the mosque a first shocker was seeing a chap who looked more Irish than I. Red hair and freckles are the classic signs and unexpected in these parts. He may have been a foreigner like myself but I have my doubts as there are few in this area. I have been suprised by the variation in the look of the Turkish people. While there are many with features that one might expect many others look more like Western Europeans. The result of centuries of mixing and conquests no doubt. The service consisted first of a sermon and then a short time of prayer. I must say that for me it was very conformist. In the same manner as many Christian services there is no participation from the congregation. Old rituals are performed, some of which are in the Arabic language which many of the Turkish people I have asked don't even speak. The holiday also brings many to the service that normally do not attend. Christianity has its CEO (Christmas, Easter only) Christians and it seems perhaps Islam has the same. I understand that I base these notations on a first impression but I hate the dynamic of conformity in organized religion.

In homes and especially at the mosque all persons remove their shoes and this still poses a problem for me. When Emre and I (it was a service for men only) were exiting the mosque we grabbed our shoes and I immediately tossed mine down and started to put them on. This still ten to twenty paces inside the door. A few gasps went up in the relative surroundings. If it wasn't for Emre quickly giving me the nudge to hold back I may have caused quite a stir.

Since the occasion as I said I have spent the days visiting the families and friends of my hosts. All have been welcoming and interested in my travels and plans for Turkey. It has been great for me to just relax and enjoy people and events. I mentioned that I arrived in Turkey feeling exhausted after months of travel and so I need this time. I am physically tired from time on the road and emotionally tired with constantly saying goodbye and traveling to strange environments. I need time in the same place for at least a week or two. My hosts are often worried that I am bored but I have tried to reassure that it is a need for rest and not boredom that I am experiencing.